Sunday, November 22, 2015

Not a Halloween Blog

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Boots: Frye Melissa Button Boots

"Wish we could turn back time, to the good old days..." - twenty one pilots

I figured I'd better post an outfit before newcomers think this is a damn Halloween blog, so here you go - my first true Fall outfit of the year. The Fall Wedding one doesn't count because that dress was paper thin, and I was wearing open-toed shoes. I just looked it up, and Winter starts December 22, so I've got exactly one month to make up for my lack of outfit posts during my favorite time of the year. It just hasn't gotten consistently cold here yet. I've literally worn flip flops one day and boots the next. Yes, I'm going to blame my lack of posts on the weather, because it surely isn't due to my shitty blogging skills.

Anyway, it finally got cold enough on this particular day to break out the Frye boots and a new cozy dress. This dress is one of those rare beasts - a sweater weight dress that doesn't feel like a tobacco sheet. For you city slickers, that's the extremely rough and itchy material that cured tobacco is wrapped in to take to market. I used to love to go to the tobacco warehouse with my "deddy" and sit on a sheet of tobacco, drinking a Pepsi while the auctioneer walked by spouting his gibberish. For some reason, the feel of tobacco sheets didn't bother me much back then, but now, I don't want that mess anywhere near my skin. This dress is super soft and warm, and it hugs my curves beautifully without being too tight. And the earrings...have I told you about the earrings? I've had them for a few weeks now, and I've already found several different outfits that they go with perfectly, none more so than this one. 

This door has been a favorite photo shoot location of ours for some time now, so I was disappointed to see that the glass had been broken. However, once I saw the photos, I thought the broken glass actually added something. I mean, I, myself, am certainly not as pristine as I was a few years ago. Life will do that to you. I'm 20 pounds heavier (still not a size 16 GOMI) and have a lot of my own "broken things." There has been quite a bit of renovation of buildings going on downtown the past couple of years. Many of the run down locations we used to use for shoots have been revitalized. This broken glass may be just what this door needs to get a new fa├žade. Of course, it could just get boarded up like so many others. Here's hoping that the next time I visit this door, we will both be in a better state.

I freaking love this song. Anthem of my life.

Wednesday, November 4, 2015


After last year's Halloween party was over, the first thing I said to myself was, "Never again." I had put so much planning and money into it to only have 4 people out of the 100 I invited come. Anytime the subject came up over the last year, Jerry would tell me that I didn't have many people because I had the party on the actual day of Halloween. I was pretty sure it was because people just don't like me. Whatever the reason, I stayed resolute in my decision to never throw another Halloween party again. And then September came and catalogs with Halloween costumes and decorations starting pouring into the mail...and I suddenly found myself planning another Halloween party. "It'll be different this time," I told myself. "I'll have it the day before Halloween." I was starting to sound like that guy in Pet Semetary who keeps bringing his loved ones back to life even though he knows they are going to come back evil as fuck.

This year's turn out was slightly better. I had 8 people, twice as many as last year, and those 8 people were freaking awesome. We had ourselves a good old time. However, the amount of stress this year's party put on me (or I should say I put on myself) was not so good. I had a full blown panic attack the night before the party. I'm not sure why. I think it was the perfect storm of a bad cold, my period, and the party. Anyway, I'm pretty sure this year's party was the last one ever...I mean it this time...  

The Invitation

 Just Chillin' Before the Party
No, not really. I knew I would be too stressed and busy to get good quality pics of my costume the day of the party, so we had a dress rehearsal a few days before. Hence, the pics in my last post.

 One of my new Halloween decoration acquisitions this year was the "Enter If You Dare" Luminaries from Grandin Road. I did a homemade version last year because they had sold out, but this year I had the real deal. The bags themselves are really nice quality, but one of the bag's lights did go out on Halloween night. Apparently, if one of the lights goes, they all go. I thought they didn't make lights like that anymore?!? Anyway, I was able to find the culprit and get them back up and running. One Grandin Road product that did elude me this year was the Window Crasher Ghosts. I tried to purchase them a full 2 months before Halloween but they were already sold out. I thought they would look so awesome in my upstairs windows. Maybe next year... 
 We made 2 Jack-O-Lanterns with the kids this year. Jerry did the a cat one with my daughter, Kiley. I did a Freddy Fazbear with my son, Hudson. How'd I do?
Yeah, I suck.

 The Spread
I went a lot easier on the food front this year. Those witches fingers cookies were a pain in the ass last year and nobody ate them. This year was all about the balls: cheese balls, meatballs, and cake balls, oh my!

Brain Punch
This is the same punch as last year except instead of eyeballs floating around in it, there is a frozen brain. I thought that worked well with our zombie theme. I got a brain mold and froze some of the punch in it. Easy, peasy.

Cake Eyeballs
Jerry has become quite the cake ball chef. They are his go-to for pot lucks now. So, it was a no-brainer that I would have him make them for the party. Of course, we put a Halloween twist on them and made them look like eyeballs with some gel icing and mini M&M's.

Deez Nuts Bowl - Got 'em!
I saw this Nut Bowl in Target early in the Halloween season. I told myself I would come back for it, but when I did, it was no where to be found in the store. After 20 minutes of searching, I found the last one in the store on a random shelf. I did a little dance in the middle of Target. It doesn't take much to get me excited.

Alcoholic Beverages
'Nuff Said.

I went with a veggie tray this year over the chips and guacamole. It was a hit. In fact, all the food was a hit. I reprised the Spider Cheese Ball from last year, and Jerry made some of his famous meatballs that I stuck little Bat toothpicks into for some Halloween flare. 

Shot in the Arm
I mixed it up for the Tempt Your Fate game penalty shots this year. Two of the shots were just your standard issue Fireballs, but three of them were a nasty little concoction called a Brain Hemorrhage. Jerry had one and he said they didn't taste bad but that the texture was really gross. Glad I didn't have to try one. Texture gets me every single time. I stuck with the eyeballs.

Let them eat cake...eyeballs.

Game Station
We played 3 games this year: Tempt Your Fate, Die in the Wink of an Eye, and an out of the box game called Curses. I think Curses was the biggest hit. I highly recommend it for your next party. As with most things, the drunker you are, the better it is.

 Family Portraits
 I displayed the family portraits that were the inspiration for our costumes on the game station.

Speaking of which, introducing their majesties, Queen Marie Antoinette and King Louis XVI. 
Back from the dead and better than ever:

Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Let Them Eat Brains

Shoes: Bamboo
Earrings: Anthropologie Cloudburst Chandeliers

Sorry I'm so late posting these, but as you can see, I've been very sick...

Wednesday, September 30, 2015


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"Ignorance is bliss. I'm a happy idiot" - TV on the Radio

I've been sitting on these pics for a month now. I figured I'd better go ahead and post them because Winter is coming, and I'll look like a damn idiot in a tank top and sandals. Also, I haven't posted anything this month, so today is my last chance.

I've been kinda pissed at the Internet lately. The sheer amount of misinformation I see on it on a daily basis is mind boggling. For instance, there's been a graphic going around Facebook since the beginning of September that says, "Remember clocks go ahead 1 hour next Sunday. Please Share." No, mindless zombies, please do NOT share. Daylight savings isn't until November 1. There's a thing called Google. Use it. The more you know ~~~*

The worst, though, is all the political misinformation all up in my damn news feed. "News" feed my ass. It should be called Lies Feed. I'm no fan of politics, but damn if I don't have a hard time sitting idly by while some idiot goes on a rant about a politician based on pure fiction. If the quote seems unbelievable then it probably is, except if it's by Donald Trump, then it's most definitely true.  

Speaking of Trump, what in the ever loving fuck is wrong with people? More and more of my Facebook peeps are coming out in favor of that dumb ass. I actually had someone like and share an article on my feed yesterday about his stance on climate change. The following quote by the Trumpster is sadly legitimate:

"I'm not a believer in climate change. It's called weather changes and you have storm and you have rain and you have beautiful days. Look, it's weather. We have bad floods. I can't watch the evening news anymore. Every time you turn on the evening news, they show there's a big rain storm, there's a tornado, there's this. I mean, you can't watch the news anymore. And so it's weather, and it's been that way for so long. I believe in clean air, immaculate air. I believe in clean water, all of those things, but I don't think we can destroy our country."

Da fuck did I just read?!? Stop the world, I want to get off. I feel like I'm living in some alternate universe where fiction is fact and fact is fiction. It's pretty comical until you look at the poll numbers and start considering that this douche canoe could actually become President. When you think about the stakes involved if that happens, ignorance is no longer bliss. Ignorance is we're all fucked.

*Opinions stated here are just that - opinions of a cranky, old fat lady. No need to get your political panties in a wad. I have no desire to debate politics in the comments. However, I am down with continued bashing of Trump. Good day. The Mgmt.

Thursday, September 10, 2015

Friday, August 28, 2015

Darth Vader Dress

Shoes: Latigo Zaca Heels

"So let it fall and watch it break into shards of light and gold. A perfect end...cascading." - Atlas Genius

Another day, another bralette. This one's even color coordinated. Again, a dress that would not have been possible for me without it. This bralette is actually the most supportive one I've bought. It's classified under sports bras on Free People's website, but let me assure you, it's a bralette. I'd probably put an eye out if I wore this as a sports bra. Of course, I would actually have to exercise to do that and that's not gonna happen...

My kids were so fascinated with this dress. I don't think I ever recall them noticing an article of my clothing as much as this one. My little girl kept touching the back of it as I walked and asking, "Mommy, why is your dress so flowly?!?" My boys dubbed it my Darth Vader Dress because it reminded them of the movement of Vader's cape as he stomps around the Death Star barking out orders and dealing out death via the Force. Yep, sounds just like my parenting style. How fitting.