Side Boob

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Earrings: Anthropologie

"We talked of your clothing..." - Albert Hammond Jr.

Ah, middle age - that glorious time in your life when you are desperately clinging to the shell of your youthful self but you feel the cold, hard clutches of old age tugging harder with each passing day. During these volatile times, it can be difficult to determine what is appropriate attire to put on your aging body. Quite simply, you just can't pull off many of the things that you could in your youth, but your brain seems to take a much longer time to catch up to this fact than your body. What is any self-respecting middle-ager to do? My opinion - Rock the shit out of whatever makes you feel good!

I guess I'm on my like 3rd mid-life crisis, because at this age that's what it's called when you do anything other than what society expects of you. So, what have I done this time? Nothing quite as shocking as I've done in the past...I've been shopping a lot at Free People lately. Yes, the store that one of my friends referred to as "that store that sells overpriced crap made in China ." What's worse, though, is that I have purchased several bralettes. Yes, bralettes. You know, those lesser-than bra like contraptions that offer absolutely no support but don't make you feel like your chest has been in a vice all day. Yeah, those. And I have been actually wearing them out of the house and even to (get your smelling salts) work...dun, dun, duuuun. 

You see, I've always perused through my local Free People store and sighed while looking at all the cute little bralettes with their pretty little lace and sexy crisscrossing straps, knowing that my D cup self would never be able to pull them off. I just wrote them off without ever trying them on. Then, a few months ago, I was in a Free People store and fell in love with a top. The only problem was this top could not be worn with a conventional bra. I was showing Jerry my dilemma and getting ready to walk back to the dressing room to take it off and hang it back up when the sales associate said, "That looks really nice on you." I said, "Yeah, but I can't wear a bra with it." She looked at me and pointed to the bralette she was wearing and said, "You don't have one of these." I said, "No," feeling like I was not a part of some exclusive club, "my boobs are too big for those." She replied, "I have friends who are D cups who wear these all the time. Let me get you one to try." I reluctantly said OK, knowing full well that it was going to be a disaster.

She brought me one of the lacey ones in a size M. Bless her heart. I immediately told her I was going to need the XL. She came back with the larger size, and once I got it on, I immediately loved it. It was so comfortable, and so sexy, but who am I kidding? I'm too old to be going around showing my bra. I decided to venture out and show it to Jerry, and well, that sealed the deal. He now thinks bralettes are the greatest thing since sliced bread. I figured if I like it and my man likes it then who the hell cares what everyone else thinks, so I bought it and the top.

For a few weeks, I had just the one bralette and was wearing it quite a bit, so I decided to order a couple more with the cute straps. I'm not gonna lie, these do not offer as much support as the lacy halter style, but when worn under loose fitting tops and dresses, they work just fine for my taste. That's the key for me. I have to wear the bralettes under really loose fitting, tent-like items. They totally don't work under tight fitting tops.

So, that brings us to today's outfit. I bought this dress several weeks after purchasing that first lacey bralette. It goes great under this dress, and I would have never been able to pull off this dress without it. It's a whole new age inappropriate world, people! I must say, though, that this particular dress shows a little more side boob than I'm completely comfortable with, so I put a cardigan over this outfit for work. However, once I stepped out of the office building, I ditched the cardigan and let my middle age freak flag fly. A little side boob never hurt nobody.



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