"I have seen what man can do when the evil lives inside of you. Many are the weak and the strong are few, but with the water we'll start anew." - Grace Potter and the Nocturnals
Ok, so I know alot of you are so over my free-spirited, finding yourself crap and are ready for me to move along to other topics. I guess I felt the need to defend myself against all the hateful and hurtful comments I've received lately. In all honesty, I'm over myself too and feel it's time to move on.
I'd like to talk about hate. I've been thinking alot about it lately. Some of the comments I've received seem to be filled with it. Words like "revolting" and "gross" have been used to describe me. I don't understand how complete strangers could have such hate for me. I also don't understand how people who, in their opinion, are taking the moral high road could say such hateful things. It seems very contradictory to me. I'm far from perfect and my morals are probably not up to the standards of these people, but I would never insult someone as they have insulted me. Bearing this in mind, I think it's time to start moderating my comments more strictly. Up to this point, I've been moderating the comments, but pretty much letting everything through. I can only think of a couple of comments I have deleted. I dislike the thought of censoring, but given recent developments, I think it's time to start rejecting comments that are in the spirit of hate rather than debate. This is not to say I will reject any comments that don't agree with me. I appreciate those commenters who question my actions in a tactful way, but I no longer want to give a forum to those people who want to take over my blog with their spirit of hate.
This photoshoot was taken in the ditch behind my apartment. I'm not a big fan of elephant ear plants, but these looked pretty cool lining the ditch in masses. This was not one of my favorite photo shoots. It was the hottest day of the year and these plants were seriously itchy. I didn't realize elephant ears were water-resistant. One fell in the water, and when I picked it up, it was completely dry.
I know I've said that I don't let people's opinions bother me anymore, but I must confess I was a little down last night over the negative comments I received. In a way, I'm glad it bothered me. I don't want to be hardened by all this. I think there needs to be a delicate balance between caring what people think and not caring at all. It reminds me of the elephant ear. It lets the water roll off of it and remains unchanged. We should do the same with hate.
Grace Potter the Nocturnals - Nothing But The Water
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Bonnie, Bonnie! I have to tell you- those pics on your Flickr page (I found it by clicking on the pics on your blog) of you and your kids with the sparklers are AWESOME! That is what you need to harness- that relaxed, just being yourself body positioning. I'm telling you, lose the "posey" stuff. You are beautiful! It shines through much better when you are relaxed. The candids, the spontaneous- those are the good ones. These are too forced, too overdone, too trying too hard! Let it go, sister! Just be! You are gorgeous but these make you look like a drag queen.
ReplyDeleteP.S. Love the shoes!
ReplyDeleteP.P.S. We need some pics of you and the new man!
Anon@4:52: LMAO! Drag queen? Wow! Cut me some slack. It was 100 degrees out, and I was surrounded by itchy plants. I'll keep your suggestions in mind.
ReplyDeleteOkay, don't take that to heart- the PICTURE makes you look like a drag queen- YOU do not. Relaxed you, comfortable you, not trying too hard you is stunning and definitely not a drag queen! Here's my point- stop doing the boring old "posey" stuff, act silly, be yourself, forget that you are taking pics for your blog, dance around, be free 'cause it is far more beautiful than anything that is forced (and I'm sure you'll agree from the recent events in your life)! :)
ReplyDeleteRock it out like you know you can!
those plants are huge! no wonder that's what they are called.
ReplyDeletethey make a beautiful background.
My Verdant Slip Dress is on my way to me finally after being back ordered since May, I hope I look as lovely in it as you do. I do think that you should not take your nasty blog comments to heart. Considering that Kim, Tara and some others have had to monitor their commenting due to the childish and just plain mean comments people have left is more a reflection on society than your blog. I think because you offer more personal comments it becomes easier for people to let their inner Voldemort take over the keyboard. If not for you then weed out the meanies for those of us who enjoy you blog and cringe every time we see one of those comments :-)
ReplyDeleteI read your blog every day. I am an Anthro lover and I look forward to your gorgeous outfits, your reviews, and beautiful photography. Until now, I have silently followed along as you navigate these new events in your life. Your candor is refreshing and thought provoking. Reading blogs (yours included) makes me happy. It is my ME time where I get a little thrill from looking at pretty clothes and reading interesting posts. I find it fascinating (and sad) that there are people out there who wait anxiously for the opportunity to read a new entry, just as I do, but with malicious intent. They get their little thrill by attacking and being nasty. I'm glad you're going to filter your posts.
ReplyDeleteMechelle
I agree that the stiff poses seem fake, and no smiles makes it all seem just a bit stiff. Try for natural photos instead of posed ones, it helps.
ReplyDeleteNot that you asked, but I think you should not approve the inappropriate comments, just as TeriLynn13 suggested. I follow your blog because I love fashion and Anthropologie, not because I want to judge your personal life and decisions. I enjoy your outfits and I enjoy reading your honest feelings about your life and hope you continue to do. I have followed your blog for about a year now, but have only commented in the past few weeks because I have been shocked by some of the rude comments.
ReplyDeleteMaybe it would be a good idea to start a separate blog about your life, and keep this one strictly for fashion. That way, you and your readers can get the best of both. Just a suggestion.
ReplyDeleteReading your blog makes me feel brave, too... not because I'm going through anything like what you're going through, but it makes me think, "Hey, if Bonnie can make some tough decisions to move toward happiness, maybe I can too." Thank you. ♥
ReplyDeleteHi Bonnie - I am a casual reader of your blog, but have never commented before. Regarding the angry/malicious comments, I can't help but wonder if they aren't, in part, a response to the whiplash-inducing juxtaposition between having serious personal issues to navigate, and the main blog focus, which is fashion. Not to say that you shouldn't continue to do things that make you feel good during this challenging time - just that you look so lovely and serene and put together in your pics, and yet you write about very difficult, serious things. The net impact is to give the impression that you are being flip in your writings, whatever your actual feelings might be.
ReplyDeleteI'm not suggesting that you change things at all, but maybe trying to make a bit more sense of all the anger and hate.