Blame It All On My Roots

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Pants: The Limited
Shoes: Kensie Girl
Jewelry: The Limited

"It's clear to me, how the roots shape the tree." - Horse Feathers

It's been a few days since I posted on here. I must confess it was an unintended break. You see, I've been trying to get used to my new way of life. You know, the one where I don't buy things. I'm still waiting on the feeling of pride from being fiscally responsible to kick in. So far, the only feeling I have is a strong urge to shop.    

I got paid on Friday, so this past weekend would have usually been spent adding new items to my closet. Instead, I spent it finding things to get rid of. Not only am I on a mission to buy less things, I'm on a mission to simplify my life. I know it isn't going to be easy. All these fourth of July sales going on this week have been killing me. However, instead of trying on new clothes, I'm determined to try on a different way of life.

When I think about it, it seems that happiness to me has always equaled getting new things. I'm the baby of the family (my sister is nine years older than me), so by the time I came around, my parents had a pretty successful farming operation going. They had lots of money at their disposal and didn't mind spending it on me and my sister. Like so many kids, I remember Christmas being the best time of the year. It was great spending time with my family, but I especially loved getting up on Christmas morning and checking out the large spread from Santa. My childhood weekends were spent shopping with my mom and aunt. Every Saturday for years, we would go to the local mall, and I would always get a new toy. I must have had every single My Little Pony in existence in the 80's. During my teenage years, I found a new love in clothes, and my mom didn't mind making the trip to Raleigh to help me indulge in it. By the time I got out of college and started making my own way, I knew no other life than constant consumerism.

I guess this sounds like I'm blaming my reliance on material goods on my parents. I'm not, but I can't deny the influence they had on me. Luckily for me, I got a good degree and have been able to sustain the type of lifestyle I was used to, but I'm at the point in my life where I want to try something different. I want to get back to my real roots - simple country living. I come from generations of farmers on both sides who didn't have the means and didn't feel the need for things. I know my parents wanted a better life for me and that's what motivated them to do the things they did. However, I'm starting to realize that the better life is a simple life. A life not full of things, but a life full of love, laughter, and memories. 

P.S. As I go through this transformation in my life, you will no doubt see a change in the blog. I've got a couple of newer items you still haven't seen yet, like the top I'm wearing. However, in the future, you can expect to see a lot more older items. I hope this will make for a better life and a better blog. 

P.S.S. If this post caused the theme song from Green Acres to get stuck in you head, you are not alone. 

Horse Feathers - Father



  1. It gets easier. The important thing is that you're realizing how much influence material things have on you. You know what I would love to see? You and Jerry on a nice trip somewhere. Paris? The Bahamas?

  2. This post really resonated with me. It sounds like we grew up with similar situations, at least with regard to being "spoiled" (I hate that word)/rooted in consumerism. The past few days, I've had to come to grips with some of these "stuff issues," as my fiance and I just made our move from Florida to NC. The pure volume of unnecessary things we've accumulated is emotionally overwhelming. There really is something to be said for simplicity. You're so right: it's the love, memories, and human experiences that make life valuable, not the material things. Really, just they're just a burden most of them, when it comes right down to it.

  3. oh you poor kid, you grew up with parents who had the income to spend money on you - how terrible that must have been and it is most CERTAINLY to blame for your inability to set a budget and your sucky personality and all of your shitty life decisions. Poor sad little rich girl - how horrible that must have been for you. Your parent's were such bad people - how dare they become successful and ruin your life - they should have stayed simple country folk and you would have been so much better off
    You have the most amazing ability to blame all of your poor decisions on everybody but yourself. What a victim you are - but it will be lovely to not have your presence spoil my lovely southpoint anthropologie. I give you 2 weeks and you'll be back to your old ways.

  4. [applause] By George, I think she's got it! An excellent post; love these sentiments.

  5. I'm really excited about your transition, and new focus on things! Can't wait to hear more about it in the future, I went through the same thing myself and have felt really great about myself and life ever since! :)

  6. I recommend Kasser's The High Price of Materialism. That book puts a lot into perspective. Another great one is the documentary Century of the Self. You can find it on youtube. I admit I am an emotional shopper and as much as I try to limit my spending I still like introducing new items into my wardrobe. Good luck with your change. Like any other habit you can control it. :)

  7. LOVE the way your first picture came out with all of the tall lush flowers around you, framing your hour glass shape!! What a great shot!
    What kind of flowers are those? I don't recognize them as something we have up in the North.

  8. I love the setting of these pictures Bonnie! :-)

  9. an anonymous lurkerJuly 5, 2012 at 12:52 PM

    are there activities that you can do in place of shopping? maybe something creative like painting or crafting? you have a good eye for asthetics. best of luck-
    i'm rooting for you!

  10. How did I miss that tee at Anthropologie?! So cute! I gave you an award. Check out my blog to see what it is!! :)

  11. Yes! I just moved, and I definitely felt weighed down with stuff. I couldn't believe how much we had accumulated in our apartment in just a year!
    Welcome to NC! What city did you move to?

  12. Oh, I'd love to see that myself. Paris might not be a good idea...too many places to shop! LOL!

  13. I wish I could paint, but I'm afraid anything I would paint would be pretty sad. I've been thinking about picking up photography as a hobby. Now, if I only had a photographer to show me the ropes. Oh yeah, I just so happen to be living with one. ;-)

  14. Thanks, Stefie! Yeah, you wouldn't have these "flowers" up North. It's tobacco! I thought it tied in pretty good with my post on my roots since that's what my parents farmed when I was coming up.

  15. It's good to hear a success story! I hope I can do as well as you did!

  16. Good for you Bonnie, best of luck. This is definitely something I struggle with as well. My vice is J. Crew. (;

  17. Good for you for taking such a positive step in your life, Bonnie!

  18. My fiance and I had been in our three-bedroom house for just over five years, so yeah, lots of junk. It felt so good to purge some of it. We're actually neighbors: I'm in New Bern!

  19. Bonnie I would recommend you to go Jamaica. I went there last year and it was amazing. You will see why I recommend it: I must admit when we first arrived there and got a shuttle from the Montego Bay airport to Negril (our destination) I was a bit saddened by the way some people were leaving along the way. After few days of being there I was saddened by my own behavior, those people are HAPPY. Not only because most of them were smoking marijuana lol but because they know what's important in life. We never saw anyone begging for food, they were all working and selling things from their farms. We had the chance to hook up with some locals at a small restaurant, the owner comes to the USA often to visit some of his relatives but he is happy living in Negril. This is where his family and friends are. They enjoy the simple things in life. We also met a couple at our little hotel from the USA who have been going to Jamaica every year for the past 10 years. Not only the place is gorgeous but you will learn new ways of living. It's so easy for us to look down on those people saying we have it better, yes we do in some ways but I question myself if this is really the land of the free, it might be but it's not the land our genuine happiness lives.
    Our hotel was so inexpensive, It's called :Blue Cave castle, you should google it, it's really a castle with simple rooms though and we paid $60 a night :] Anyways I totally agree with you, I wish you the best on your new lifestyle. I've been also trying to get rid of few things that I thought would make me happy. Good luck!

  20. Sounds like I had an upbringing of the complete opposite, but with the same end result. :) However, I started 'weaning' myself off of my bad habits --not always entirely successful, but the progress is there!


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