Merry Christmas Haters!

I decided to do a bit of "hate reading" today and came across a couple of things that I thought I would address as a sort of Christmas present to all my haters out there. Yes, I know, you all don't care about my lame blog, but we all know you've been bad this year and Santa isn't bringing you jack, so just take a freaking Christmas present where you can get it, alright?

First of all, people are still having a hard time believing that I can fit this fat body into a size 6. Look, I don't give a rat's fat ass about size numbers. I only provide the Sizing Reference on this blog, so it will help readers decide what size to order online. I had no idea it would turn into something that could be used against me in a court of fashion law. "If it DOES fit, you must acquit." However, I do understand the argument that no one is a certain size. Hell, my waist measurement probably changes on a hourly basis. So, I've decided to remove my Sizing Reference from the side of the blog and, instead, give you the size of each item in the outfit posts. I think this will be more helpful, because if you are interested in a certain item, you will know exactly what size I got in it. Of course, this will probably only help you to know what size not to get it in, since I'm stuffed into all my clothes like a can of sardines, but that's a whole 'nother story...

The other topic I ran across was that my new blog header looks like a bunch of pubes (aka pubic hairs). Is it sad that I knew this was going to come up as a topic among the haters? I have 3 kids, so I'm very familiar with grade school humor these days. Besides, these are people who think lacy tights look like pubes. It seems they see pubes everywhere. Sounds like a personal problem to me. Anyway, I thought I would give you the story behind the header, so maybe it would make a little more sense to the haters why there are a bunch of pubic hairs floating around up there.


No, the above image isn't some crazy Rorshach Test. It's a wonderful print created by this lady that was used on Anthropologie's tissue paper a few months back. It's hard to see in this image, but those are birds flying around on that print. If you know me, you know I love me some birds. To me, the bird symbolizes freedom which has played a very important role in my life over this last year. Also, this blog is an outlet for me to freely express myself, so, I knew I wanted to incorporate birds into my blog header.

When Jerry told me he wanted to draw a blog header, I gave him my favorite portrait of myself and this tissue paper. I loved what he created. I interpret all the squiggly lines as a nest and the name of my blog symbolizes the egg. I couldn't think of anything more perfect, because this blog is sort of like my little baby that I nuture each day. That's why it hurts when people say negative things about it, but I'm learning to deal with it in constructive ways. Hence, the point of this post.

So, from the very bottom of our crazy, aldulterous hearts, Jerry and I wish all you haters a Merry Christmas! You've been very, very bad this year!

  X-Large size just for you!

CONVERSATION

49 comments:

  1. You're a crazy crazy lady.

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  2. OMG Bonnie, I LOL when I read ur blog today. I never thought about ur blog header as the pubes until u mentioned it. I cant believe that some people think that way.
    Happy holiday Bonnie

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  3. Okay, I can't stop laughing at the pube header and pube tights. That would have never crossed my mind. I guess I just don't have pubes on the brain.

    That's a great (XL) picture of you and Jerry. You make a cute couple :-)

    I hope you have a Merry Christmas!

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  4. Merry Christmas to both of you Bonnie! I love this post! It made me smile and laugh because I totally understand where you are coming from. :)

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  5. Im a lover, not a hater. :)

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  6. Well, now I feel left out because I never once thought that about your header! I just thought it was cool, especially the birds! :)

    Your post reminds me of the song 'Winter White' by A Fine Frenzy.

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  7. Merry Christmas to you and your loved ones!

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  8. Bonnie, I wish you wouldn't torture yourself reading the negative comments. There is nothing you can do or post that will change some people's opinions, they just enjoy making fun for their own reasons. If they don't like your blog, they don't have to look at it. I, for one, enjoy your posts. BTW, Jerry's a cutie.

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  9. LOL, Happy Holidays Bonnie. :-)

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  10. You just lowered yourself to the same level as your haters.

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  11. LMAO! Merry Christmas. I, too, am a lover not a hater! Merry Christmas!

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  12. You two look great together. I hope you have a great holiday together. But what a downer for a holiday post. Would have been nice to focus on positives for a holiday post. I think you focus way too much on your critics and I hope in time you will be able to just brush it off and also not go looking to see what's written about you. But obviously that is your choice. I still enjoy following your journey . Happy holidays and I hope the new year will be a good one for you and your family.

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  13. Now, see, I thought they looked like sperm! LOL! In all seriousness, you can't let that stuff get to you, Bonnie! I love your sense of humor about it though!

    You look beautiful in your dress! (And btw, Jerry has HUGE hands! He looks like he could palm your head!)

    Can't wait to read your next post. Thanks for keeping it real!

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  14. Haters are gonna hate! Who cares what they think.

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  15. She was mentioned a couple of times on that website and now she continues to bait her haters so she can have more interesting blog content. It's a desperate and obvious ploy for attention.

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  16. I know. It's so sad isn't it. A lady who takes constructive criticism, has a sense of humor, and defends herself. Crazy!

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  17. LOL! You dirty, dirty girl, Catherine!

    Thanks! I thought the same thing about his hands. They are a really great accessory because they make my waist look tiny!

    Thanks for appreciating the realness! I don't think there are a lot of people out there who get me. I'm so thankful for readers like you!

    Merry Christmas!

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  18. Thanks! Sorry it was such a downer for you. I meant it to be funny. I think a lot of people don't get my sense of humor. As far as seeking at what's written about me, it's a hard habit for me to break. It's like I know it's out there, and I can't help but look. Jerry always shakes his head when he sees me reading it. Maybe I'll come to my senses one day. Thanks for following my journey! Happy Holidays to you and yours!

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  19. You're right, Kimberly. I just can't seem to help myself. Maybe I'll make it my New Year's resolution not to read that stuff from now on. Glad you enjoy the posts! Yes, I have to agree with you about Jerry, he is a cutie and has the biggest heart of anyone I know. Merry Christmas!

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  20. Thanks, Hannie! Merry Christmas to you and yours!

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  21. Well, I'm glad at least one person didn't see a big hairy vagina! LOL!

    Oooh, going to songmeanings.net right now to check out that song. Thanks! Merry Christmas!

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  22. Damn! You've got me all figured out. You're so clever!

    I love how when anyone defends themselves against the haters they are seeking attention. No matter what I say, the response is "Attention Whore." I may need to work on more interesting blog content, but you definitely need to work on more interesting rebuttals. Yawn.

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  23. Thanks Liz! For what it's worth, you were getting a lot of love from my haters. Keep up the good work! Merry Christmas!

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  24. LOL! Me too, Rebecca. I guess my brain has progressed since 2nd grade. Although, it did make me wander if that's why men think those lace tights are so sexy! ;-)

    Merry Christmas!

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  25. Glad I could give you a good laugh, Lanny! That was my intention with this post. And these people think I'm crazy...LOL!

    Happy Holidays!

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  26. This post is in very poor taste. It is neither funny not cute. It's just a sad cry for attention from a hollow, miserable girl. I hope you find peace in the new year.

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  27. First time poster...reading for awhile now...

    This is your blog and you express yourself whichever way you want!!!
    I personally love you for your music recs ... We seem to like similar groups.
    I also read (re-read) the awakening and it is a deeper read as I read it during my 30's.

    Just tell the haters to Get Off My Blog A******* (GOMBA)

    I read through some of the mean comments and I laugh because these people really have no life.
    Sigh, high school never ends for some.

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  28. You are so juvenile Bonnie, it's embarassing.

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  29. This post might have been funny, were it not for your usual smug shit at the end. Look at you, so proud of breaking up someone else's marriage. How are Jerry's ex-wife and kid doing? Or are you not able to think beyond the end of your own selfish nose.

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  30. Oh for God's sake, what am I suppose to do? Go in hiding? Jerry is a grown man and made his own decisions. I didn't break up his marriage. It was already broken. Go preach your self-righteous bullshit somewhere else.

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  31. GOMBA! I love it! If you don't mind, it's going to be my new motto. I'm not wasting my time typing up intelligent responses to these haters anymore. I'm just going to say GOMBA!

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  32. I'm so lucky to have you as a lover, Sherry! Merry Christmas!

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  33. Love it. What is this website you are talking about? I think I'm out of the loop...? Who CARES what people think!! Not me! :)

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  34. There is nothing humorous or funny about your post. Instead you come across as pathetic and bitter. I am embarrassed for you.

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  35. "It was already broken" is no excuse for interfering in a marriage. If he was a real man, he would have chosen to break up with his wife on his own before becoming interested in you. This would have allowed everyone to move on with some dignity. I don't really care what his wife did or what was wrong with his relationship or yours, but the way you all went about this and the lives you've ruined will always make you look much worse than any pithy little blog you write on. What goes around comes around, and this is especially true regarding relationships.

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  36. Bonnie, out of genuine concern, I wish you would stop feeding the trolls as they say, and ignore the "haters." I mean, you have a right to address what you want on your blog, but there's so many more productive things you could expend your energy on. Just saying.

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  37. Hormonal much? How far along are you?

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  38. All these haters bother me. I feel like I can relate to you, and I admire who you are. And youre awfully cute too!

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  39. I must say at parts of your blog I laughed out loud :). Not easy to make me do either!

    Haters are everywhere and unfortunately us women can be soooo mean to each other in the name of "honesty". I had a friend ( long time) make a snarky comment about the size I said I was vs her opinion and felt the need to tell me I looked BIGGER. At first I was stunned and then hurt because it was a friend. Realized later that it was just her way of trying to knock me down a peg and to assert herself, despite her claims to be happy with her size clearly not as much as she claims. If a stranger said that I would think "....and I care what you think because....?". Point here is that it's easy to make snarky comments to others, people are often bullies and the sand box mentality lives on forever. But: it is how WE handle it and stop feeding into haters. That is what they do---hate.

    Yes, I saw Jerry's huge hands myself and thought wow.......enjoy the holidays!

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  40. Oh my goodness! I'd never even considered that your header looked like a big mess of pubes! That's hilarious! I'll have to examine the lettering more closely now, because no doubt, being as perverted as your two are, Jerry will have hidden all sorts of kinky things in those filthy letters! LOL

    I love that you wear your heart on your sleeve Bonnie. I love the honesty in that. We've all made mistakes in life, and you've just lived yours a little more pubicly - oops - I mean publicly than most of us!

    I hope the new year brings you much happiness. Haters will hate, and its sometimes hard not to bite, but please don't take it too personally. We lovers love you because of your honesty. Its about the whole you - warts and all ;o)

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