A Great Start

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Shoes: Bamboo - Size 8.5
Necklace: Anthropologie Gilded Impatiens Necklace

"It's a new year. I'm glad to be here." - Yeasayer

December 31, 2010
Jerry
blog
I just read some of the comments on your blog. That's got to be some great therapy, and it should help to confirm that you are on the right track. There is something about the way you write that is sincere. People can often tell if it's being phoned in. That's where I think your best talent is. Your ability to communicate your obvious passion for the subject matter.

December 31, 2010
Bonnie
re: blog
Thanks. That really means a lot to me. I really needed to hear that tonight. Your talents were definitely appreciated by me and all who commented. I hope you have a happy new year!

I was lying on my couch around 11 pm on New Year's Eve last year getting ready to watch the ball drop on TV when I received a message. When I heard the beep on my phone, I remember thinking, "I wish that would be from Jerry." For some reason, he had been on my mind all day. We had done a few photo shoots together but hadn't really talked that much. There was no reason in the world why I should receive a message from him, but still, I found myself hoping. I was very unhappy at this time in my life and the photo shoots with him were rare bright spots in my dark world. When I picked up my phone and saw his message, my heart skipped a beat. His words were the few kind ones I had heard in a really long time, and they touched me. I could have never known that night that my New Year's Eve would be so very different a year later because of him.

On Saturday night, Jerry and I went out to the fanciest restaurant in town and had a delicious 4 course meal. Oh yes, it was very fancy, "dahlings!" I saw several local doctors there and even the former mayor. I know, it's Kinston so that isn't saying much, but it sure beat sitting on my couch. My favorite part of the meal: dessert. It was some kind of chocolate and pretzel flavored cake topped with ice cream, and let me tell you, it was a taste explosion. I've never had anything with such a rich flavor in my life. Man, it was good!

After dinner, we made our way to the big party room upstairs to bring in the new year with a fireworks display and live piano music. While we waited for the countdown, we had fun taking pictures. We even managed to get one of the two of us by placing the camera on a table and using the delay feature. Thank God we managed to get a better picture of the two of us than that mall glamour shot from the company Christmas party. Poor Jerry looks like a deer in headlights in that picture. Every time we look at it, we joke around that I keep him chained up to some pipes in the basement.

I'm so very thankful Jerry came into my life this past year. Of course, I wish it had been under better circumstances, but I believe it happened the way it did for a reason. He has enriched not only my life, but my kids lives in so many ways. I've never been happier. It's not always cupcakes and rainbows, but when it's good, it's really good. No matter what the future brings, I don't doubt any of the difficult decisions I've made over this last year. I know in my heart that I'm exactly where I'm suppose to be. As the clock hit midnight and the fireworks flashed outside the window, Jerry and I shared a magical New Year's kiss. It was the perfect ending to a wonderful night, and the perfect start to a new year.


Yeasayer - 2080

CONVERSATION

63 comments:

  1. So I was watching "'how I met your mother" on Netflix while reading this, and this song came on by Michelle Featherstone called "Careful" and it seemed to fit the post. I wish you both all the best in the comming year, and it's good to have you in our family!

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  2. I'm glad the year started well for you Bonnie, and I hope that things continue to get better and better!

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  3. Weightwatchers2012January 2, 2012 at 10:56 AM

    Wow you have really gained alot of weight

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  4. Happy New Year, Bonnie! I hope 2012 brings good things for you.

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  5. Thanks for pointing that out. Yes, I have gained about 5 pounds over the holidays. I guess happiness has it's drawbacks.

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  6. Thanks, Anna! I hope you have a great year as well!

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  7. Thanks Matt! I'm definitely going to check that song out! It's so great to be in your family. You guys have really welcomed me with open arms, and I can't tell you how much it has meant to me. Best wishes for the new year!

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  8. Really ??? I think she looks great Could you be any more shallow?

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  9. Amazing how a picture's worth a thousand words - that photo of you and Jerry projects so much happiness and love. Wonderful!

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  10. Oh, Miss Bonnie, these photos are gorgeous! You and Jerry look so happy. And you inspired me to go for it and get the Dulcie Dress, which I've been eyeing for ages! Yay!

    Happy New Year, pretty lady!

    (p.s. I'm having a giveaway on my blog, http://www.JulieRoseSews.com ...Ack, I hate being one of those commenters that mentions stuff like that. But I figured I'd mention it while I'm here.)

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  11. Beautiful pics, Bonnie! Love the soft lighting! That picture of you two is adorable!

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  12. Great dress, but unfortunately it does nothing for your figure :(

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  13. What compelled you to leave that nice observation Ms Weightwatcher?

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  14. You hate being one of those commenters but yet you did it anyway....0__0

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  15. You look great Bonnie and that last picture is just the best, you both look so happy! Have a great New Year!

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  16. Bonnie, I think you look beautiful in the dress. You and Jerry look so happy together and I am glad that you have had much of this year together. To the people posting negative comments...it is sad to see that you are starting the year out by spreading negativity and anonymously insulting someone. Hopefully no one treats you the same way. You really aren't doing the world any favors.

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  17. It was a delicious night, as was the meal, as are you. I can only hope you'll allow me to spend the rest of mine by your side. Was this too much? Not from where I stand.

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  18. Really? Can you give me details as to why and what you would suggest I wear to flatter my figure?

    Honestly, I thought it made me look a little heavier (maybe because it seems to be a little short waisted on me), but I still thought it looked really cute. I have gained some weight (see fat roll in first picture), but I don't think everything I wear has to make me look super skinny. I feel this dress flatters my curves. Just my opinion.

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  19. Thanks, Julie! Happy New Year!

    Girl, post whatever you want about your blog in the comments. I don't mind at all. The more people who have a chance at getting free stuff the merrier! :-)

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  20. Thank you for your words of wisdom, Judgey McJudgerson!

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  21. Thanks, girl! I plan on printing it out in black and white and framing it!

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  22. Happy New Year, Rebecca! May it be a great year for you as well!

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  23. Thanks, Catherine! It was very dark in that room, so the lighting was tricky. I think Jerry did a great job!

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  24. Thanks, Godiva! We are so very happy! I wish you the best this year!

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  25. It is a cute dress, which is why I said "great dress" before, but I also agree that it makes you look heavier. I think it's a combo of the high waist, neckline and your bust size. I think that you look good with dresses and shirts that have a more open neckline.

    Nothing malicious here, just offering my opinion.

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  26. Thanks for the constructive criticism. I really do appreciate it, and I have to say I agree with you about an open neckline being more flattering on me. Oh well, at least my boobs were warm that night! :-)

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  27. I love the last picture! You both look very happy. I thought the same thing about the last picture of the two of you. This is much better. :)

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  28. If it makes you feel any better, Bonnie, I was wearing that Across the Prairie peasant tunic top from Ruche yesterday, and my big ol' puffy down jacket because it was freezing here. The cashier at the grocery store asked me if I was expecting!! She thought I had a maternity top on! Talk about demoralizing!

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  29. Girl, you have a slammin body. Dressing it in clothing that is cut for a 9 year old is doing you NO favors. Embrace your curves and play up your assets, the little girl cut and cutsey pie hairclip just don't do you justice. Sell that dress and use the money to buy something that makes you look like the grown woman you are-and you'll be the envy of all the women in the room and turn the heads of all the men. Happy New Year-go get'm.

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  30. Your narcissism is mind-boggling.

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  31. Did you really fit in a size Medium ? I'm 120 lbs and the Medium just barely fit

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  32. Oh no! A 9 year old? Really? :-(

    I guess I can kind of see how it could be perceived that way. But I love my cutsey pie hairclip! I had orginally planned to pull my hair up and pin the clip in the back. Now, I'm thinking I should have done that. I think it would have made this outfit look a little more mature.

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  33. Oh no, Catherine! Why do people do that? What an idiot! I love my Across the Prairie tunic! I'm a hippy at heart, so I tend to like a lot of things that could be mistaken for maternity wear. Don't let it get you down. It's their problem, not yours.

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  34. Yes, I managed to fit in a size medium. I'm no expert, but I don't think weight alone determines what size a person wears. Height and proportions play a big role too.

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  35. It is one of my favorite tops too! :( I love the boho feel of it and the embroidery. I usually get a lot of compliments when I wear it, not questions about a possible baby bump! Geesh! I work out 5 days a week and while I am not a waif, I am certainly not fat so someone could mistake me for preggers! I came home griping to hubby about it. He said he loves that top on me and no way do I look pregnant! I'll still wear it. I like what you said up there about if you feel good in it, that is what matters!

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  36. Exactly! I've learned the hard way that you can't please everyone. What one person thinks is gorgeous, another thinks is hideous. You should only care about pleasing yourself. If you like it and it makes you happy then wear the damn thing. You will lead a miserable life if you always worry about other people's opinions.

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  37. You are one cool chic, Bonnie! I like your style!

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  38. Bonnie,

    I have never left a comment before but I think you look great and who cares what other people think. Wear what you like. They are writing you mean comments because they are insecure and they are hiding behind their computer screens writing mean things to people because that is the only way they feel better about themselves. Don't let any of it get you down, that's exactly what they want from you! Happy 2012!!!

    Sara

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  39. So here's the thing. I've been reading your blog for a while, and while I've had several times I've wanted to say something- I haven't. Now I am- I know you're a size 6- we've met in the real life. I know you have a great body but dear sweet baby Jesus woman what the hell is wrong with you? I have read fitting room reviews from you time and again and you keep saying how one thing is flattering on you but this other thing isn't and EVERY SINGLE TIME the thing you say looks awful looks great! People are haters by nature so they're going to say you're bigger than a size 6 but from all the pictures you post it's not JUST because they're haters it's because you are not dressing your body correctly. All your amazing Anthro pieces make you look crazy frumpy. You're a pretty lady stop making yourself look like a frumpy bag. You not only owe it to yourself, but also to the Anthropologie. They don't deserve that kind of advertisement. I wish they carried fat girl clothes, if so I'd rock some Anthro myself- alas they don't so stop abusing your Anthro rights woman!

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  40. This dress is actually super awful on anyone who has any curves because the waist isn't well-defined at all. I agree that you don't need for the clothes that you wear to make you look skinny, but with an hourglass-ish figure if you don't define the waist you just look like a brick.

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  41. Wow, that's pretty brutal. So, nothing I wear is flattering on me? When I do those reviews I always get both the dressing room assistant and Jerry to tell me what they think. They almost always like the same pieces I do. And we're talking about different assistants each time I go. Also, it's not like they tell me everything looks good on me. Jerry, especially, is very straight-up with me. So, I guess these people also have the same condition I do. I'm not professing to be a style expert, but it's not like I'm totally clueless. I watch What Not To Wear. I know the rules about proportion. I agree this particular dress is a little too high waisted for me and therefore, makes me look a little heavier than usual, but I don't think it's hideous. Having said all that, maybe I'm just delusional and have a messed up perception of myself. If this is the case, then I'm open for suggestions. What can I do to look less frumpy? You said my "amazing Anthro pieces" so does that mean the clothes I have are okay but I'm not styling them correctly or do I just need to sell everything I own and start over from scratch?

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  42. Super awful? Brick? Geez, did everyone decide to make their new year's resolution "make Bonnie feel as bad as possible about herself."

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  43. That was very brutal. I agree. I looked back through your fitting room reviews. There were some things that looked great on you that you thought looked bad but I can honestly say that you are not posting pictures each post of hideously unflattering outfits. For the most part, I think they look spectacular. I think this particular dress is not the best one you have in your closet but it isn't awful. It looks like it is made for someone stick straight with no boobs is all so it is a bit tight. That's all. I love the little hair clip! The work Christmas party dress is probably the only other one of recent posts that wasn't the greatest. I think it is hard to pull off strapless when you have a larger chest, unless you have a super toned upper body. You looked amazing in that one sheath dress you have (that is a good line for you). Sheath dresses, A-lines, that sort of thing- stuff you already own a lot of, judging from your posts are what look the most flattering.

    You dress very beautifully Bonnie! Don't let a few comments get you down!

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  44. Here's where I pull out my inner Stacey and Clinton. They host a show on TLC called "What Not To Wear". They are so amazing and knowledgable about what looks good on all body types. I have learned so much from them and feel like I can dress myself so much better now. Here's my advice to you. Since we have pretty similar body types I think I can help you out without being nasty or judgemental because I'm right there with you! Ok, here goes - I like the dress but I think when you wear light colored fabric on a larger chest it makes you look just, well, bigger. I know this from personal experience - I'm not hating, just...sharing from my big boob experience. Also, the neckline on this dress is also totally wrong for you. You need v-necks girl! You don't need to show a ton of cleavage, the v shape just makes you look longer and leaner. A high rounded neck and big boobs makes you look suffocated. And lastly, rethink shoes that cut you off right at the ankle, they make all legs look short and stumpy even if they are cute and vintage-y, only girls that are 5'10 plus can pull off that style of shoes. I say keep the dress and throw a denim jacket over it and rock some boots. The jacket will create length in the torso. Get rid of those shoes or only wear them with dark tights. A more monochromatic shoe/leg will make you look super tall.

    AND I love the hairclip, it's totally cute :)

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  45. Great advice Katie! I totally agree. Another idea for rescuing this dress and making it more flattering on a body like Bonnie's (and mine) would be to wear it with a long sweater- or a sweater coat. This would also elongate the silhouette. Add some cute boots and the dress could be worn to work too.
    No need to give up on your cute clothes, Bonnie. Just some restyling! I sometimes have to remind myself that something that looks great on the Anthro model may not suit my shape and age. Even if I absolutely LOVE the design, sadly......

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  46. I just hate seeing you spend money things that make you merely look "meh" and discard the ones that make you look great. I'm not saying nothing you wear is flattering on you. I am saying that some of the pieces you wear isn't very flattering. Some of the belts are too thin/too thick/up to high, some of the cardigans add unnecessary bulk, some of the length of the skirts/dresses hit you in a bad place on the leg, and all of the boho flowy pieces do nothing for your figure. Sometimes you do style good pieces in a not very good way (like the adorable fox skirt- you could have really made that skirt come alive and it just fell flat). For the record, I used to work in retail and I know that you manipulate and say what it takes to make a sale. Can't tell someone it all looks bad or you look bad for blowing sales. So you maybe discourage some pieces and encourage others.

    The most important thing though Bonnie, the thing you always say but never seem to realize, is that none of this matters. The opinions of others. Who gives a shit that some douchebag said you've gained weight (and who cares if you have? It's the effing holidays!) and who gives a shit if I say sometimes you look frumpy in something? If you like what you wear then wear it! Wear it without apology, without looking for ways to fix something someone was critical about. Live your life without apology and without looking for approval from others. You've been doing that- with Jerry and everything- take it a step further and into your closet too!

    I enjoy reading your blog, it's endlessly entertaining and sometimes mesmerizing. I don't always agree with things, but like I just said, my opinion doesn't matter in the grand scheme of your life. Keep doing what you do lady.

    PS- I love the little glittery flower hair piece and the shoes.

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  47. I do have to agree that this particular outfit makes you look quite wide - and you're not! This is something I struggle with sometimes too. We figure out the silhouette that works for our body shape, but sometimes we get bored and we try something different, which ends up being unflattering. I think that's what happened here.

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  48. Raz was saying in general it is super awful on anyone with curves. Most of these comments aren't mad to make you feel bad but rather give advice on how to wear things that flatter your body type (which is banging :) ) and don't make you look bigger.

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  49. Why is it "spreading negativity and anonymously insulting someone" when someone gives constructive criticism? That's all I've read on this thread. It's been supportive but also critical.

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  50. I did. I'm sorry if it offended you that I'm excited about my new site and want to spread the word that I'm giving away cute, vintage-y pieces. It bothers me when people are serial promoters-through-commenting, but since I almost never do it, and Bonnie didn't mind, AND I also had a relevant comment, I guess you're in the minority. More chances for other people!

    Sheesh. You try to give away some cute stuff and there are still people who take issue.

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  51. Bonnie, after reading the comments, your response, and then your new post, I think you may be misinterpreting some of these comments. People are critiquing the dress, not your figure. I don't think anyone here thinks you have a "bad" body (there is no such thing as a bad body). People are just trying to say that sometimes certain articles of clothing aren't a good match for certain body types. You've got a large bust and certain styles of clothing are going to be more conducive for that body shape (nothing high-waisted, and you definitely want an open neck). I personally deal with wide hips and have to dress accordingly. You're absolutely right that sometimes you just have to wear what you want to wear (even with my wide hips, I bite the bullet and wear jeans/pants even though they don't look that great on me). But even when wearing items that maybe aren't built for your shape, you can still find the best version of that item. It's not like you couldn't have found a great dress to wear on New Year's Eve. There are a lot of variations of dresses, many of which I'm sure would look fantastic on you. When it comes to the whole shoe thing, I agree with you. It's going to be difficult to find shoes that don't cut off at the ankle, so go ahead and bite the bullet and wear them. Just figure out how to incorporate them into your wardrobe. If you had worn a different dress, I don't think the shoes would've even been an issue.

    (All this being said, if it makes you feel better, I didn't think this dress looked good in any of the online reviews on the anthro site. The high waist didn't flatter one single lady that tried it on and posted a review of it, and you can tell that many of those ladies also have fantastic figures. Sometimes....it's just a bad dress that wasn't designed for actual women that don't happen to have the same shape as a wooden dress form.)

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  52. Good one!! Also, you're really fat now.

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  53. I'm loving the hairclip. If you can't showcase your inner princess on NYE, then when?

    The dress, I think probably looked much better in person. I don't think it photographs well, what with the layers and textures and all. I'm sure you looked great. But yeah, in photos, it doesn't flatter you the way a different cut does.

    As for the shoes, I don't understand why you think you can't fond shoes that don't come up to your ankle. Pumps? Just a simple pair of pumps would gave really set this dress off. I know everybody's into the gladiator look right now but they are so visually heavy that they really flatter few people. Even if those people happen to have a slamming body.

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  54. Anthropologie doesn't deserve "this kind" of advertisement? This has to be the silliest comment ever. Come on when you are putting your outfit together are your really thinking about how you have to dress according to the rules so that the store doesn't get a bad advertisement? wow

    People just have different taste and it should be respected. I particularly was never drawn to this dress but I wouldn't write negative comments to those that wear it.

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  55. Come on, you're pregnant. Just announce it.

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  56. And your're really nasty now.
    Not to mention rude.

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  57. I agree - hope you have a great next year! I like that dress and think it's fun to mix it up and try different styles. Good for you. You'll look back on these pictures in twenty years and think wow, I looked amazing - why was I worried after those comments? Personally, I got the noon & night dress and it's a little short waisted for my shape, but I don't care - I love it :) Just rock it! Take care.

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  58. I've read all the comments - I think the dress is gorgeous. I also think it's a hard dress to wear, but I think you do a good job! I think what people are seeing is the shortness of the torso and the poofiness of the bottom. I think if it would have some sleeves, it would have offset the bottom a bit and made your waist look smaller. But I think you look great :) I'm not critizing at all. Just a fellow lady that has the same questions/issues with fit sometimes. As long as YOU like what you are wearing it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks!

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  59. Hi Bonnie,

    I don't think she was trying to be mean. She wasn't saying you are a brick, just that the dress made you look squareish (which I think we all know is not the fact, you’ve got some great curves and tons of outfit post to prove it). You should be happy you’re an hourglass, because that is one of the most desirable shapes. Many people go out of their ways to try to create an hourglass. We’re lucky as we don’t have to create, we just need to showcase. I'm an hourglass shape too and it has taken me a long time to figure what works for me. I still have tons of hit and misses. I also wear things that don’t “accentuate” my figure, such as Flavia Shift. I know I would be better in something with some structure instead of a “tent” dress, but I love it and I find a way to make it work with the right accessories. So if love the dress, make it work, try some different accessories or just remember, you don’t have to be perfect everyday. I look at your outfit photos every time you post and sure there may be some major hits and some misses, but that’s how real life is. You can’t have your best outfit photo everyday. You’ll always have ones that stick out because they are amazing, and others that are just so so.

    On a side note, I’ve read your subsequent post and you make it sound like everyone was tearing you apart. Granted I’m not the subject of this post, so I can’t tell exactly how I would feel in your position. However, reading most of the post, there were a select few who were truly mean. Many just stated that though you have a great figure, this outfit didn’t showcase it and suggested some other options that might be best. I know you struggle with self confidence based the honest post that you do. That can sometimes make a person look for negativity where it may not have been intended. I truly hope that 2012 helps you to become confident in whom you are.

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  60. FYI, I am 125 and I wear xs. It is not about the weight alone but many other factors

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