Jailbird

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Dress and Jewelry: The Limited

Shoes: Rocket Dog

"You're kept in an open cage so you're free to leave or stay." - Death Cab For Cutie

I don't wear stripes that often, especially black and white ones. It's not because I don't like them. Everytime I've worn black and white stripes in the past, someone has made a stupid joke like, "Hey, did you just break out of jail or something?" These annoying comments ruined stripes for me. You see, I used to be very sensitive, and I put alot of emphasis on other people's comments. As a result, I stayed away from stripes.

Well I've finally come to a point in my life where I don't care what people think. Case in point: Yesterday, for the first time in my life, I had to put groceries back at the checkout line because we didn't have enough money to pay for all of them. The former me would have been horrified by the thought of this. I would have been so concerned about what other people were thinking. The new me didn't care in the slightest. If fact, I found humor in the fact that "Had a Bad Day" was playing in the background as we were trying to decide which items we could live without.

So, there's some things I need to work on in this new life, like say budgeting. I've got way more freedom to make my own decisions in this new relationship, and I'm slowly figuring out that freedom comes with alot of responsibility. Even though I've got alot to learn, I'm happy because of the love, loyalty, and freedom I'm experiencing now. I'm here because I choose to be here, not because I'm bound by a cage of sacrifice. So, I will wear my stripes, make my mistakes, and not give a damn about what other people think. I'm finally free.

Death Cab for Cutie -5. Talking Bird Demo

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CONVERSATION

22 comments:

  1. girlfriend-maybe not buy the $300 Free People outfit and save for groceries instead. just a thought as you learn to budget.

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  2. your outfit is cute! good that you don't put emphasis on what other people think!

    only what you think, and the people you love think, is the most important

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  3. Good for you! I'd rather fuck up every day of my life than live a boring, growthless and challengeless existence.

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  4. Anon @ 12:20: You're right, I definitely need to have more restraint when it comes to buying clothes. I budgeted $400 for my trip to Tennessee when I went to Free People, so I was okay with that purchase. I actually blew my budget this time because I bought a bunk bed off Craig's list for my kids.

    mybeadifullife: Thanks!

    Kate: I feel the same way, girl!

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  5. I really like your dress - an effortless outfit! There isn't a Limited store nearby (would have to bus/drive to get there). I have been hesitant about ordering online, but I'm now reconsidering because the quality of the material looks good from your pics.

    Also, Kate @ 1:08p summed it up nicely.

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  6. What a great outfit! Love the bright necklace paired with your striped top.

    And I know what you mean about the black and white stripes comment. What happened to if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all? You don't look like a jailbird at all!

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  7. I love this nautical looking dress! It's so simple and chic, I love it.

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  8. I just do not understand buying clothing item after clothing item for weeks as you have, then saying you don't have enough money to buy FOOD at the store. It sounds like it's time to get your priorities straight. Not saying that to be mean, but a lot of people have commented on here about your shopping problem and now it's to the point where you can't buy food. Time to take a look at that, don't you think?

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  9. Love the dress! Is it a recent find? :)

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  10. Completely agree with Dana.

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  11. Although I read this blog daily (and enjoy it very much), I never post any comments. I really feel the need to post today though in response to some of the other readers' comments. It isn't anyone's business how Bonnie spends her money. She should have the right to post her thoughts and experiences without dealing with a bunch of judgmental comments. So Dana, you are not saying it to be mean? Then why are you saying it? Because you feel entitled. Typical. Time to take a look at that, don't you think?

    Keep on being honest and ignore the judgmental comments Bonnie.

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  12. I think we shouldn't try to judge other people's lives. We should appreciate more that Bonnie is sharing her life, thoughts and her passion in fashion with us. With her postings, I see life in different way now.

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  13. I don't understand how you can be flaunt your new boyfriend so openly here with no remorse at all. You cheated on your husband with this man and the worst thing is you don't acknowledge that it was a horrible thing to do and justify that as simply living life.

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  14. This is so sad, girlfriendJuly 12, 2011 at 2:51 AM

    I find it so sad to see that 2 (possibly) working people with (possibly) paying jobs have a hard time with their weekly groceries, when they can afford nice, full-priced clothing items from stores such as Anthropologie!

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  15. If I'm not mistaken- Bonnie admitted that she has not done the best job budgeting, and plans to work on improving her financial skills. Lots of this is new to her, and she will likely make many mistakes before she gets full control of aspects of her life that she may not have been solely responsible for until now. And, bye the way...how many readers of a shopping or fashion blog have not purchased clothing to make yourselves feel good- even if the money might have gone to a better place? Any of you "judgers" use credit cards"? I applaud Bonnie for sharing her struggles and her joys. Some readers just may feel a little less alone with theirs.

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  16. You look lovely, Bonnie - I'm totally digging that light blue necklace against the black and white stripes!

    And you know, judging people is so nice and easy, especially when you don't really know them but only see a fraction of their lives on the internet. Walk a mile in their shoes, in their minds, and your perspective would most likely change.

    Bonnie, I think you're great, and I adore your blog!

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  17. We're all guilty of spending money on stuff we don't need. Let's try and find any person who hasn't done this and you will be searching a long loong time. Ok, so Bonnie is learning to budget, no big deal. Why beat her up because she's still learning? The only thing she can do is try to do better next time.

    Do you pick on your kids when they can't do something perfectly right away? I'm guessing not or people would call you a terrible parent...how is the way that you're treating Bonnie any different? Why is it that some people always think that because you are over 18 you should be an adult and know everything right away???

    And Cindy, why shouldn't Bonnie talk about the man who makes her happy? Perhaps YOU would find it more appealing that she write about her forced marriage with a man who she is no longer happy being with? Go find some 50's housewife blog if that's the shit you like to read. No one needs to feel guilty for getting out of an unhappy relationship.

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  18. I think people are upset because when you are a parent, you should budget to have a little bit of a cushion for your kids... in case of emergency. It's her money and she can do what she wants with it, but what if her kid needs emergency dental care or something comes up? It's not that she can't make ends meet, it's that she is buying excessive amounts of clothes.

    If you don't have enough money to pay for the grocery, perhaps you can't really afford the clothes.

    I know this sounds really harsh, but you've admitted to shopping as an addiction. I totally support your leaving your husband and being with the man you love, but if you truly want to gain independence, truly, truly, it is to your advantage to be completely self sufficient, which includes having prepared to unplanned expenses.

    It would be terrible set back to have to go to your husband or worse, your folks, for money for your kids. It is very empowering to be financially stable.

    Anyway, best of luck, Bonnie. It's going to be a tough and hard road, but you will figure it out.

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  19. Went to a party down at county jail.....ha ha. It is great you don't let what others "might" think bother you so much. My guess is that the people who saw you having to put things back were probably more uncomfortable than you were. People really are not that bad...most strangers are the nicest. Most of the time it is those that are closest to us that are the most judgemental and hurtful.

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  20. I love Kate. I want her to be my best friend. (you look great, Bonnie..)

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  21. I'm with Tracy, a we <3 Kate fan club is forming just from that one comment! It's true, everyone's 'essentials' are different. Given that some of the groceries were able to be put back and you're going to have enough, let the frivolity-money go where you want it to! For some people it's gourmet groceries, for some it's books, for some it's clothes.

    Hope you're having a lovely night!

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  22. "You see, I used to be very sensitive, and I put alot of emphasis on other people's comments"

    You say that you don’t care a/b people's comments, but before you “allow” people to post things on your blog you have to approve them first. That’s caring a little a/b what people think and say, wouldn’t you agree??

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