Farmer's Daughter

Bonnie 5/03/2011 2 Comments Edit

"When we die we will die with our arms unbound and this is why we fight." - The Decemberists

When I was little, I was really close to my daddy. I would ride with him everywhere. One of the places we would go to often was a little farm supply store downtown. They sold baby chicks there, and I looked forward to petting them. My daddy even bought me a baby chick of my own a few times, but baby chicks are alot like goldfish in that they don't seem to last very long once you get them back home. Anyway, I miss the closeness I felt to my daddy during those times. Our relationship is very different these days. I've found it very difficult to be close to him as an adult. He's from the old-school way of thinking, so it is very difficult for us to relate to each other. He also does things for me but then holds them over my head. Recent events have strained our relationship even further. He does not agree with what I'm doing with my life and has been very direct in telling me what he thinks about me. We had a huge fight last weekend, and I haven't spoken to him since. He made several threats to take things away from me during our fight which is the way he usually gets me to do what he wants me to do. I've decided to let those things go that he threatened me with. He has nothing to hold over my head anymore. It feels good to be independent for a change. I have hope that he will come around one day, and we can have some sort of relationship in the future.

Today's photoshoot was at the very store my daddy used to take me to as a girl. Yes, it's still around. Hey, watch it, I'm not that old! LOL! I'm wearing the Contemporarian Dress I bought from blog reader, Monica. I think the vintage vibe of this dress works very well with the old timey backdrop of this store. Of course, my photographer friend seemed to be more interested in me as a backdrop to those jars on the wall in some of the shots. Can't say as I blame him, they are pretty cool jars. There were so many interesting things to take photos with, but my favorite were the chicks. They are so sweet. It amazes me how calm they are when you pick them up. I tried to pick up a duck and that thing starting squirming, quacking, and trying to bite my hand off. Smart duck!

Today's song is "This Is Why We Fight" by The Decemberists. This song is about making sacrifices in order to obtain independence. This song really speaks to me in my struggle to gain financial and emotional independence from my father.

I'm so poor right now. Thankfully only one thing tempted me at today's Anthro sale - the Make a Wish Skirt. I really like the Sagebrush Skirt that isn't on sale too. I'm trying to decide between the two. I like the Sagebrush better, but it's also more expensive. I'm holding out until I get paid on Friday to order one of them. I received a 15% off birthday discount code in my email yesterday, so I plan on using that towards the skirt purchase. Which skirt do you guys think I should get?

Thanks for all your encouraging comments and emails on yesterday's post. It was an extremely difficult post for me to write. Your support means the world to me.

09 - This Is Why We Fight

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