Signs of Life

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Dress: Old Navy
Belt: Anthropologie Looping Lanes Belt

"Oh the trees were all leafless and lifeless and black, and I wondered if the leaves could grow back. You don't know how it feels to be alive, until you know how it feels to die." - Noah and the Whale

It's Monday, my least favorite day of the week. It was so hard to get going this morning, but I'm actually in really good spirits. It was a good weekend overall. Friday night, Jerry and I hung out in bed eating pizza, drinking alcohol, and talking about random things into the wee hours of the morning. Saturday, I threw a party for my son's 10th birthday. Afterwards, we drove to Anthropologie so I could try on some party dresses to review on the blog. We had fun looking around the store at all the Christmas ornaments that were ridiculously overpriced. Most of them were made out of newspaper. Jerry and I were inspired to try and make our own newspaper ornaments. I'll let you guys know how it goes... Yesterday was pretty abysmal. I had an IC flare up and spent the whole day in bed due to the pain. I must admit, being in pain really puts life in perspective. Any day that's pain free is a good day.

Thankfully, I'm feeling much better today and have a refreshed outlook on life. It's funny how sometimes it takes bad things to give us a new perspective and help us see all the good in our lives. I have so much love in my heart, more than I ever thought possible. There have been times lately when I have felt it so strongly it has been overwhelming. My kids bring me so much joy. It's amazing to see them learning and growing everyday. In addition, I finally found my soul mate, and although the path was not ideal, the love we have for each other makes it all worth it. Life is so much sweeter with him by my side. Finally, my mom and I are on good terms again. I've learned to ignore her negativity and focus on the positive aspects of our relationship. We're getting along better than we have in years.

It's so nice to reap the positive benefits of all the changes I've made in my life. I've been through a lot of negativity over these last few months, and many times I doubted why I was putting myself through so much pain. I mean, life wasn't horrible before, but I knew in my heart there was something better out there for me. I took big risks. I had to die to one life before I could live in another one. I had to be completely torn down before I could build myself back up. I had to see how bad life could get in order to see how good it can be. It was all worth it, though. I know in my heart I'm exactly where I'm suppose to be, and I'm happier than I've ever been.

Noah and the Whale - Shape of my Heart



  1. Here's to being happy Bonnie!! Love the colors of the photoshoot today.

  2. There are those knees :o)

    I'm so very happy for you - to hear that you and your Mom are on good terms. That has to be a lot of stress off of you!

    Love that cardigan, btw.

  3. So glad you had a good day. This may be too much of TMI type question but is there anything that helps with your IC? I've been having symptoms lately and I don't have a diagnosis yet but am starting to think I may have it. Anything that works for you at home, that I can do till I'm able to see my doctor? I could email you about it if you wouldn't mind. The comments might not be the best place for it.

  4. Beautiful outfit- that color combo is wonderful
    Make sure you update us on how your ornaments go. I love things like that
    So happy you are happy. In the end, that is all that is really important :)

  5. Thanks! I'll definitely update you guys on the ornaments. I'm really excited about it!

  6. Oh, guest. I wish I could give you some advice on dealing with IC, but I'm still stuggling myself. It woke me up at 4am this morning I was hurting so bad. The first thing I do is start drinking lots of water. I then take some AZO for urinary pain. I also pop some TUMS because I read somewhere that they might help. If the pain is really bad like it was this morning, I take a Xanax and lay day with a heating pad on my crotch. I end up falling asleep and when I wake up the burning has subsided.

  7. I put them on display just for you! ;-)

    Yes, it is a relief that I'm able to talk to my Mom again. Whatever differences we may have, she is still my mom, and I want her in my life. Now if I could just get rid of all my other stressors...

    I've been meaning to email you to catch up. I promise to do that real soon. I hope you are doing well!

  8. Thanks, Dea! Happiness really is what's most important in life. Good to see you so happy too!


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