Fractured

Bonnie 5/14/2011 15 Comments Edit

"We fake a fuss and fracture the times. We go blind when we've needed to see, and this leans on me like a rootless tree." - Damien Rice

I'm feeling very isolated and lonely as I type this on a Saturday night. I've spent most of the day by myself with the kids. It's been nice (and trying at times), but it's weird not having my mom around to keep me company. Even though my mom is a hard person to get close to, I've always talked to her at least one time a day whether it be in person or by phone. I crave her love and attention, and it's hard that I'm getting neither right now. She called this morning and asked to speak to my son. She didn't even go through the formality of greeting me. It was like I was the phone operator or something. There's a fracture in my family. I hate that it's there and would like to repair it, but I can't do it alone. I'll continue to hang around and do my part and hope that with time I'll get some help.

I wore this outfit on Monday. I can't believe I'm just now getting around to posting it. I have a backlog of outfit pictures right now. With it being my week with the kids, I just haven't had the time to blog as much. I'll do my best to catch up this week. I'm planning a trip to Anthro on Wednesday. I have no money. I'm hoping to sell a few items between now and Wednesday, so I will have some cash to use with my birthday discount. Keep your fingers crossed for me! I'm especially excited about the possibility of buying something with my discount since the big tag sale is this week. I also plan on doing some reviews while I'm there.

Today's song is "Rootless Tree" by Damien Rice. This song is dedicated to my mom. Please be warned, it has alot of profanity in it. It's ironic because I've never cussed in front of my mom, and I don't think I ever will, but this is what I say to her in my mind. I think if I was capable of saying these things it would go a long way to repairing that fracture. I think in some ways she would respect me more if I really stood up to her. It won't happen, though. I don't think I have it in me. So, this song will have to suffice, and the fracture remains.

Damien Rice - Rootless Tree (Piano Version)

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