Top: Anthropologie Edme and Esyllte Blouse
Jeans: Pilcro
Shoes: Steve Madden
Jewelry: The Limited
"Build a new reality, draw another picture of the life you could have had. Follow your instincts and choose the other path." - Muse
A lot of people don't understand why I write about my personal life on my blog. My answer: "Um, well, it's a personal blog." I started out this blog just talking about clothes, but honestly, it was boring and not very rewarding. I've had people suggest that I split it up into 2 blogs. One about fashion and one about my life. While I appreciate their suggestions, I don't agree. This blog is my creative outlet, an extension of who I am, and I don't compartmentalize my life like that. Life is messy and so is my blog. I'm going to write about all the aspects of my life, not just the good ones.
This is the harsh reality. I blow my budget, I get depressed, I say things I shouldn't, I hug inanimate objects, and yes, I have committed adultery. I'm not perfect, and I don't pretend to be. I'm just a flawed individual who has a passion for life, happens to love the store Anthropologie, and likes taking pictures of her outfits in creative ways. If that offends you then just move along. I don't care about being popular. Clearly, I'm not in this for money or perks. No store or advertiser would come near me with a ten foot pole. To me, this blog is about sharing all the parts of my life in hopes that someone can be inspired or at the very least relate. I welcome constructive criticism. If you are just plain mean, well, I welcome that too, but don't expect me to always respond nicely, especially if you catch me in a bad mood.
All of this to say, over the next few days I'm going to share some intimate details about my life. (Yes, it can get even more intimate.) Some people have complained of being confused about my recent life changes because I haven't shared the full story. They're right, I have been intentionally vauge about the details. Not because I was ashamed or didn't want to share, but out of respect for the people my actions affected in real life. Everyone involved seems to have moved on now, so I think it's the right time to address what happened. I'm going to attempt to do this without bringing details about these other people into it. I feel the best way to do this is to share the correspondence that occured between photo boyfriend and I before all this happened. He saved every email. These emails are precious to me. There are over 1,000 in a 4 month period, so obviously, I'm not going to share every one. I'm going to give you the highlights, if you will. These emails may help you understand, they may make you hate me even more, or maybe you just don't care. Whatever the case, I think it will be a rewarding exercise for me to document that time in my life and if someone else gets something out it then that will be great too. If you don't care about my life, just look at the pictures and get a laugh or maybe some outfit inspiration.
Oh, and in case you're worried that I've totally left fashion by the wayside. I'm going to Durham tomorrow for a business trip, so Anthropologie reviews will be coming your way soon!
Muse - Hoodoo
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I am excited to read your love story....
ReplyDeleteI second Kat! Your honesty and openness are SO REFRESHING! I respect you for living an honest life and keeping it real with your readers.
ReplyDeleteLove love love the tunic! Gorgeous look, love your carefree style!
ReplyDeletexo,
Lauren
mildmediumhot.blogspot.com
Magnificent pics Bonnie. You look so beautiful and at peace with the world
ReplyDeleteBonnie, your blog is more interesting than any of those OOTD blogs. It's a story, a series of ongoing shorts, if you will. Some of my favorite authors have come out with books full of shorts. You know, ideas that don't warrant an entire novel, but are immensely enjoyable (and quite memorable) despite their brevity. This is how I see your blog. It's a book I'll keep picking up to see what the next story is. If it's boring or I can't relate, then I wait for the next one. You, Miss Bonnie, are a treasure box. The thing that keeps me coming back is your confidence. Whether you realize it or not, you have a confidence to you that very few of us posses. You not only write about yourself and what you know, what you've done, where you've been in life, but you give a visual to go with it. You throw photos of yourself out there for anyone and everyone to see and critique. And you KNOW how critical women are of other women (obviously your readership is primarily female), and yet on some base level I'm betting you really don't give a crap what all the strangers think. This is your outlet, I for one am one of your devoted readers and I appreciate the mix you offer. Do I care about your sex life? No. Do I care about the romancey aspect of it? No. Do I care about your background story? Yes! What I find interesting are the choices you've made and the road-map of reasoning you followed to get to those choices. Which demons did you have to banish, what areas of your life did you have to abandon and then re-work to find an acceptable compromise? I find it all very very readable, and food for thought. You are becoming the kind of person I would love to sit down and have lunch with on a fairly regular basis (in the real world, if you lived closer, if I knew you, etc.).
ReplyDeleteContinue on in your current fashion, I for one, will remain.
I have the opposite perspective. I think this blog is turning into a personal therapy session for Bonnie. Just too much personal information and always couched in a light that justified her actions. Not judging, but for once would like to read about something other than Bonnie's ongoing personal problems.
ReplyDeleteLove the first photo of you sitting in the grass - pure hippie! :o) I admire your forthright attitude AND your photos. Luckily, we're living in world where we can pick and choose what we read, and I pick your blog. Thanks for giving me the option!
ReplyDeleteMe too :)
ReplyDeleteThen go read something else?
ReplyDeleteThat's a great idea. I often wonder what leads people to their chosen paths - the "turning point". Is it a gradual thing, one too many things, or one specific event. What makes the mouse become a lion.
ReplyDeleteI appriciate the honesty. If this is your personal blog with some fashion, then I think we will understand more of what we are going to get when we peek into your blog and see things we are not used to seeing on other blogs.
ReplyDeleteWish you the best, and I am interested in seeing how you and your life progresses :)
No one says you have to read this blog. It's the creation of the blogger, and out there for you to look at or not, as you will. Why criticize? Just read the other blogs that interest you. If a blogger uses her space for personal therapy then so be it. Why do you care enough to post a negative remark?
ReplyDeleteBonnie I think it's wonderful that you are open to (constructive) critiques while also staying true to yourself and your vision for this blog. I agree that this blog is for you and I do think that sometimes people mean well in their advice but end up feeling hurt if you don't take that advice. They don't realize that this is your blog and you alone pilot it. I don't always agree with what you write but that's OK. I comment on the posts I like and just leave well enough alone on the ones I don't. Either way I have respect for you and your blog.
ReplyDeleteFirst, BONNIE! You look stunning in those pictures. I love them all.
ReplyDeleteSecond, it's your blog. Write about what ever you want, and that will make it interesting for other people to read. If they don't like is, they can go somewhere else. I don't understand why that's such a hard concept for people to grasp.
Looking forward to reading your story.
I'm so jealous of the scenery in this photo set. I want to live there. You look beautiful in all of these pictures. Like many others, I love your honesty and bravery, and though I'm sure you don't need me to tell you this, it's YOUR blog. Write whatever you want!
ReplyDeleteI think you may need to consider that your post of accusing other bloggers about being mean girls/bullies has caused Tara to close her blog. I do get your perspective about the whole crocheted clouds incident, and honestly, I agree with you that it does look better on curvier girls. I am a size 0 and was not affected by it (I also have the dress). True, it may not look as good on me as it does on curvier people, but I still like the dress and Im not at all bothered by your opinion. In that aspect, I think some bloggers over-reacted, but I dont think you bringing it up previously did anyone any favors. Its just like digging up a grave. We should all move forward.
ReplyDeleteFrom one "guest" to another....I agree with what you're saying but Bonnie only wants to hear what the extreme ass-kissers post because she can't deal with any kind of tough scrutiny. Bonnie and her high school clique have one rule, and it's a rule you MUST follow: Kiss up or get out!
ReplyDeleteHi Bonnie,
ReplyDeleteLooking at the scenery in your pictures always makes me want to move out of Los Angeles. I really like the grass, the blue sky and the non-smoggy air. :-)
Well, this should get interesting (in the comments anyway). Maybe it will help all of your readers to understand your situation better. I just hope photographer boyfriend was not also married with children.
ReplyDeleteI never comment, but I have to today. Your my favorite blog to read- I appreciate your honesty along with your lovely style.
ReplyDeleteI second Katie and Jen. If you would rather not read the type of content fou md on this blog...... Move on. We don't all like the same things. Find some bogsmthatnyou are comfortable with, instead of trying to change this one.
ReplyDeleteGood grief. I hate auto spell check. I really am literate"......
ReplyDeleteThanks Roxy! You are so right. My opinions are just that - MY opinions. I don't expect everyone to agree. If fact, I'd be pretty weirded out if they did. I'm glad you are able to enjoy the parts of my blog you like and move on from the ones you don't without taking it personally. You are one cool chick!
ReplyDeleteThanks Shelby! I needed to hear that today. It's been a rough one.
ReplyDeleteYes, I'm sure the comments will get interesting. I think the people who are going to understand already have. I don't think this will change anyone's mind, but at least everyone will have the whole story. What will happen if he was married with children?
ReplyDeleteThanks LIsa! This comment made me feel so good! This is precisely why I do this blog. I love sharing myself with others, and not just the pretty stuff. I love showing people the ugly parts too. I hope this can help others in some small way. I feel really lucky to have you as a reader.
ReplyDeleteSorry you don't like the blog. However, I think I write about more things than just my personal problems. Remember Red-Bitch? Not a personal problem. Also, I don't try to justify my actions. They are my actions, and I own them. If I do something wrong, I'm the first one to admit it. On the same turn, if I do something right, I admit that too. The problem is you and I may not agree on what's right and wrong. All I can do is stay true to myself and if you don't like what you read then there is nothing I can do about that.
ReplyDeleteLOL! I knew what you meant!
ReplyDeleteThis made me laugh! I am quite the tyrant in your eyes! I think I've proven time and time again that I can deal with tough scrutiny. If I couldn't, I would have stopped blogging by now. Scrutinize away. I welcome your critique, but I can't guarantee I will agree with your assessment.
ReplyDeleteI'm not willing to take responsibility for anyone closing down their blog. It's their choice. As far as bringing the dress incident back up, I thought it was relevant to what I was discussing. I agree, we should all move forward.
ReplyDeleteI love this Katie! I have truly been a mouse all my life. This was a life changing event for me. I don't know if I'm a lion yet, but I'm closer than I have ever been. I hope you enjoy reading my story.
ReplyDeleteBonnie, I've been reading several Anthro - centered blogs for about a year (though I rarely comment) and somehow never found yours until the other day when I was trying to find out what happened with the big scandal. I have to say your blog is so refreshing - I love that you mix your personal life and beautiful pics/OOTDs. In fact, I may or may not have spent a couple hours looking back over your last year of posts and reading about your journey and finding yourself and what makes you happy :). I found it inspiring and can't wait to read your story.
ReplyDeleteI have to wonder what difference does it make if it is a personal therapy session or not? It's your blog, Bonnie.- your way (in my opinion) to express your feelings, your take on life, your love for anthro, photog BF and your kids (all of those if you so chose, if you want to throw in something else, so be it). If people dont want to read it, they dont have to! Love the tunic, so want it (I dont remember that one!?!) Look forward to the reviews. After buying two sweaters last week, I am trying not to go into Anthro for a few weeks.
ReplyDeleteJust to echo what has been said...this is your blog. No one else's. I, for one, look forward to reading it. Your page embodies the elements of what I like in a blog: honesty, multi-dimensionality, a flair for the dramatic, and more than just OOTD. It might not be for everyone, but it is for me. I'm along for the ride.
ReplyDeleteDitto. I was going to comment, but Lisa said it so well. So I'm just going to go with "ditto."
ReplyDeleteI'm a blog reader and never comment but I feel I had to comment on this one. Your blog, every time without a fail, reminds me of Nicholas Spark's novels. The pictures along with your stories, it always draws me back. Just be yourself, it makes this world more interesting.
ReplyDeleteThen I suggest you don't read BONNIE'S BLOG. Because based on the title it will be about Bonnie's life....which includes good times and bad times. Go read an Archie comic book if all you want is laughs.
ReplyDeleteI doubt that Bonnie is posting any of this stuff to get feedback from people. You do know what a blog is right? People express themselves any way they want and other people read it if they want to. She's not asking for your permission....she doesn't need to. If you don't like the water then get off of the boat!
ReplyDeleteCatherine, what difference would that make? Oh, yes we're in the 50's and everyone is supposed to stay married because it is better for the children to be raised in a loveless environment. I was raised in such an environment and my siblings and I begged our mother to leave our father...but she wouldn't. Our life was miserable...but they stayed married so I guess everything worked out like it should in your fantasy land. Wake up and smell life!!!
ReplyDeleteOh no!!! Tara closed her blog because she didn't like someone standing up to her? Oh what are we going to do? Maybe Tara closed her blog because she didn't have anything nice to say to or about anyone and decided to keep her nastiness to herself. Ever thought of that???
ReplyDeleteBonnie, first I think you are very brave. Few people would have the guts to post what you did and to examine their lives that closely. Secondly, keep on posting whatever you want, whenever you want. I personally think it is wonderful that you have a record of your meeting, how you became friends and pictures from the beginning. Not everyone has that. Stay true to yourself and remember that if you are not happy the people who care about you (your kids, photo boyfriend, and true friends) will not be happy either.
ReplyDelete