Metamorphosis

Skirt: Anthropologie Monarch Skirt

Sweater: The Limited

Flip Flops: Gap

"'Oh,' she says, 'you're changing.'
But we're always changing." - Counting Crows

Metamorphosis: a profound change in form from one stage to the next in the life history of an organism.

I think metamorphosis is an accurate description of what I've been through lately. When I look back on my life, it seems like one of these happens every decade. First there was birth, which, thankfully, I don't remember, and then in my teens there was that lovely event called puberty, which I wish I didn't remember. Ten years later at 23, I got married, bought a house, and had a baby all in the space of a year. Things settled down for awhile, and now, at 34, I'm changing once again. The difference this time is these changes are internal as well as external. In some ways, I think these are some of the most important changes I've made in my life so far.

Change has always scared me. I've always tried to avoid it at all cost. So, naturally, I've had a hard time dealing with all the decisions I've made lately. The thing that has sustained me is the same thing that motivated me to make these changes - the man I love. I wasn't looking for love. It found me. I knew I wasn't fulfilled in my life, but I thought "this must be as good as it gets" then he came into my life and showed me everything I was missing. I had feelings for this person that I've never experienced before, and as good as it felt, it was tinged with pain because I knew the consequences of those feelings. Neither one of us was ready for this sort of thing, but no one is ever really ready for these sort of things. Love happens and if you can let go of your fear and let it direct your course, it can change you like you never thought possible.

05 - Counting Crows - Anna Begins

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