Hiking Ruffles

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Dress: Free People
Sweater: Anthropologie Hiking Ruffles Cardigan
Belt: Anthropologie Looping Lanes Belt
Tights: Anthropologie Floral Spray Tights
Shoes: Steve Madden Candence Boots
Hair Pin: Anthropologie

"Scar tissue that I wish you saw. Sarcastic mister know it all. Close your eyes and I'll kiss you. 'Cause with the birds I'll share this lonely view." - Red Hot Chili Peppers

I was standing in my closet trying to figure out what to wear this morning, which is a really daunting task lately given all the criticism I've received. However, despite all that's happened this week, I was feeling really good about myself and decided to create an outfit that really personified me but broke all "the rules." I dare ya to call this outfit frumpy! Hell yeah, I'm a brick...a brick house, that is!

I started with the tights. I really wanted to wear these tights. One, because it was cold. Two, because they're cute. And three, because these are the only pair of tights I own where the toe seam doesn't go under my foot and aggravate me all day. I looked in my closet for a dress that would go with the tights. There were a couple of options, but I had worn those dresses with these tights before. I wanted to do something different this time. I noticed the body con dress I purchased from Free People over the summer went pretty well with them, so I grabbed it. Next, I knew I needed a warm sweater to wear over this sleeveless dress. I love my cozy Hiking Ruffles Cardigan, and I hadn't worn it yet this winter, so I decided to give it a try. I added a belt and some boots, and I had myself an outfit. As I stared into the mirror I thought, "Damn, my hips look big!" I'm no expert at "the rules", but I suspect it has something to do with wearing a lighter color on my bottom half and topping it off with bulky ruffles. I battled with myself over whether to go out into the world with such scandalously big hips. In the end, I felt really good in this outfit and decided to go for it.

It takes courage to go out into the cruel, cold world these days knowing you don't look as skinny as you possibly can. We've been taught to minimize our hips, flatten our stomachs, elongate our legs, and hide any hint of a curve that might make us look OMG fat. Well, today, I decided to let my curves hang out for all to see, and it felt good!

I have to say all these people calling me fat and ugly has really sucked, but it has also been good exposure therapy for me. I feel like I've developed some pretty strong scar tissue at this point. I'm like, "What else you got? Huh, punk? Bring it!" I had a commenter recently tell me that they keep seeing me go through these same patterns, but I don't seem to be learning anything or gaining any strength. I want to assure you that I am. I like to think of myself as climbing a mountain. I stumble and fall sometimes, but I gain my composure and keep on climbing. It gets easier to gain my composure each time because of the things I learned the last time I fell. So far it's been a really lonely view from the side of this mountain, but I've heard that once you reach the top, the view is spectacular. 

Red Hot Chili Peppers - Scar Tissue

CONVERSATION

16 comments:

  1. I love the tights. So much fun :)

    It's my opinion that the blog is your happy place, why let the negative Nelly's rain on your happy place? Who cares about free speech? Delete that ish and move on! Life is too short! Enjoy your closet and a great life with the people you love!

    Have a great weekend!

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  2. Oh, I love this post! You look like a lovely little forest fairy. The mixture of textures is beautiful.

    (p.s., I received my Dulcie Dress in the mail today and it is gorgeous, yay! I think I'm going to lower the neckline a few inches, though. Luckily I know that Mood Fabrics carries the same jersey fabric that the neck and armholes are bound with, so as soon as I get back to NYC I'll make it a bit more comfortable for my neckline-claustrophobic hourglass figure. So glad I ordered it! And got a price adjustment, yessss.)

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  3. I don't think your hips look big here actually, and I think you did a good job putting this together. I'd give you a second look on the street and think "oh, she looks cute." A lot of folks really liked your last outfit, but I wasn't sure about the tights. With this outfit, you picked the exact perfect tights to wear.

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  4. It is so heartbreaking for me to know that people could be so cruel to such a nice (stylish) person. The thing that people forget is that style is about presenting ourselves in a way that expresses our creativity and individuality. I have no doubt that if we were to peek into the closets of these naysayers it would be filled with boring garments, lacking originality. I perceive these individuals to be jealous of you and simply engage in cruel criticism in order to break your spirit. By the way, I do not see a person in any of these photos that has a weight problem. I think you look fantatsic in all the outfits I have seen and I am glad that I stumbled onto your blog because I find your outfits inspiring. You have a lot of supporters out here!

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  5. I think its a great outfit! Nothing really "goes" but together it works! Makes it look effortless and fun! I really dont think it matters what you wear - at the end of the day, you'll always look better if you can portray confidence, which you seem to do in your photos. If you can carry that through to your day to day, I think it's great!

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  6. I haven't commented before, though I've enjoyed your blog for a long time now. I think your outfit is great! Very "Anthro" with the unexpected textures, the layers, etc. I love it! It's very hip, very "un-frumpy", and I think the whole thing flatters your lovely figure very nicely - especially with the belt at the waist. Honestly I think this is something I could picture seeing in an Anthro catalog or on display at the store. Great job! And, just to add my two cents... just dress in a way that makes you feel good. Ignore the negative comments - there are always people with mean things to say. You're an attractive woman with a great figure, an amazing collection of clothes, and a keen fashion sense. Just keep those things in mind and you're good to go! :)

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  7. Oh whatever, your hips look fantastic in this outfit! I was thinking how great you looked in these pictures before I read your post. Don't worry about what everyone else has to say about your body -- you're the one who lives in it, not them. And my therapist uses the mountain climbing analogy, too. Sometimes you slip, but it's the overall upward motion you have to look at.

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  8. Those tights are gorgeous! They look great with that dress! The lace, ruffles and floral tights all pull together in a very feminine, romantic sort of way. You have an enviable self-confidence about you, Bonnie. Happy Saturday!

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  9. Hi lovely, I just found your blog and I like it!!!
    Take a look on my blog and if you like we can follow each other?
    You like art and fashion?
    Have a nice weekend!

    Besos, desde España, Marcela♥

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  10. I love this outfit. You've inspired me to wear MY hiking ruffles cardi with a dress instead of my usual boring jeans.:-)

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  11. Have you read the book "The Artist's Way"? I think you'd like it. I thought of it because of this post but it would take too long to explain why. Check it out if you can if you've never read it.

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  12. I don't get why people need to criticize you. Don't let it get to you! They are so not worth your time at all. These are probably the people who embody the very essensce of their negative comments, and need to project their own inadequacies on you. F**K them! You go on living life the way you want, and flaunt your bad self!

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  13. Hot momma! I love this on you... great rule breaking. And for the record - I don't think you are frumpy and I wear green nail polish!!!.... SO TAKE THAT ALL THE NAYSAYERS OUT THERE! ;) jajajajaja. Happy New Year beautiful lady! Sherry xoxo

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  14. Oh Bonnie...what would you do without the criticism? You'd have no fodder for your blog. With all the attention you devote to discussing your "haters" it appears that you quite need them.

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  15. What were you doing in the woods? :)

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